Marriage Therapy is an exciting and challenging field of work. With eleven years clinical experience in marital counseling I am more optimistic than ever.  I have seen many couples overcome their problems, improve their marriage, and become better husbands, wives and parents.  Celebrating thirteen years in my own marriage, I am keenly aware of the challenges, and trials that married people encounter.  Add children, parenting, and everyday challenges of work and home management to the mix, and there you have it – myriad opportunities for personal growth and change!

I believe in the resilience of marriage; and that married couples are brilliant at solving the riddles and challenges facing their lives. 

There are times, however, when a couple or family face unexpected or unknown challenges and need outside counsel.  There is no shame in counsel as Proverbs 11:14 reminds us:  "Victory is assured with many advisors."  Perhaps an undesired behavioral pattern, or issues with intimacy, communication, or to simply to re-vitalize the marriage relationship.  My job is to join together with couples and help them create movement and positive change in their relationship. 

I use everything learned in my academic, clinical and personal experience to help couples optimize their marriage and realize their personal goals.  Together we work hard, we have fun, we pray, we agonize, scrutinize, strategize and get the job done.  My reputation is one of hard work, common sense, figure out the truth and orchestrate solution-based strategies to achieve permanent change.  There is no "cookie-cutter" approach to marital therapy.  Yet, I my experience has allowed me to recognize some common and not-so-common patterns that can inadvertently harm a marriage.  I am not afraid to use humor and laughter when appropriate – not sarcasm, however.  But sometimes it helps to laugh at our own misery when we can! 

A synopsis of my marriage philosophy follows:

When two people join together in marriage a "new creation" is formed.  They create something bigger then themselves.  The Judeo-Christian worldview embraces the idea that God also becomes an intrinsic part of that marriage.  "Becoming one" involves more than joining two names together or forming a physical sexual bond.  Oneness involves unconditional love – learning and growing together by allowing each other the freedom to be who they really are within the safety of a committed relationship. 

The marriage environment is grounded in respect, safety, and trust – all elements of genuine love.  When disrespect, fear, or unresolved issues invade a marriage, the love in that marriage will suffer and possibly die.  With marriage under assault by the demands of modern culture it must be sustained, protected and nurtured by acts of kindness and love.  Genuine love is a living, dynamic force empowered by the grace of God.  It must be activated to thrive.  As a contemporary Christian song declares:  "Love is an action verb!"

Sometimes marriage requires sanctification and deep cleansing prayer to initiate forgiveness and restoration.  This requires hard work, honesty, trust, and faith in God to do His part in the healing process.  As couples let go of their defenses and learn to walk in grace they overcome many obstacles facing wholeness in their marriage.  I welcome any individual or couple who wants to improve or sanctify their marriage.  Sometimes a couple is looking for major cleansing, renewal and change.  Other times a couple is mostly looking for assistance to create movement.  Whatever the request or need, I am honored to offer my services in the Lord. 

With best regards and blessings,

Tom Berscheid  __________

             "Remain alert, stand firm in your faith, 

                  be courageous, be strong.

              Let all that you do be done in love." 

                                                (1 Corinthians 16:13)    ___________

(c)  Thomas Isaac Berscheid, MA, LMFT, LPC, Licensed Minister